White House
January 27, 2020
“Anything new I should know about before I head over to
the Senate to wrap this thing impeachment thing up?”
“Are you kidding?
Didn’t you hear about the Bolton book?”
[Staring straight ahead] “So, nothing new.”
“How can you say that?
The New York Times reported this weekend that John Bolton’s new book
includes the claim that he heard the President direct that Ukrainian military
aid be held up until they came up with some dirt on Joe Biden.”
“Yup, nothing new.”
“Why do you keep saying that? This could be a disaster. This isn’t Colonel Strangelove or one of those
weepy women. This is John Fucking Bolton,
the guy who wants a war with Iran, confirming what we have been denying for
weeks.”
“Like I thought.
Nothing new.”
“Glad you’re not worried.
Now the President wants to nip this thing in the bud. He’s already issued a strong denial that he ever
spoke with John Bolton. We’re pretty
sure Senators McConnell and Graham will back us up … ah, who am I kidding, they
will back us up. But we just need to worry
about … Hey! Are you okay?”
“Nothing new. This
is nothing new. [Looks up suddenly] Oh –
I’m fine, why do you ask?”
“Well, you just stuck your pen into the desk and you have
a bulge in your forehead that I’ve never seen before.”
“Sorry, no time for chit-chat. Have to go defend the President “ [Gets up
and walks away]
“Sir, that’s the closet!”
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