Wednesday, May 8, 2019

Citing Executive Privilege, Trump Refuses to Sign Son's Report Card

May 7, 2019
Potomac, MD


Administrators at St. Andrew’s Episcopal School were flummoxed when the parents of one of their students refused to sign his 3rd Quarter Progress Report:

“It’s not that odd that parents forget to sign the report, but this is the first time I’ve heard a parent invoke Executive Privilege.”

“How does this involve Executive Privilege?”

“I asked, of course, but, um ..., the parent, was rather adamant that he would not discuss it further.”

“Just to be clear, 'the parent' we are talking about is President Donald Trump, correct?”

“The parent was also rather adamant that I not mention his name.  He was rather graphic about what might happen if I did.  Then handed the phone to his wife and said, ‘here, it’s about the boy.’”

“And was she more helpful?”

“It sounded like she wanted to be, but she ended up saying, ‘I cannot sign it because of that thing Donald said.’”

“So it was President Trump.”

[Gulps] “There are a lot men named Donald.”

“Okay.  Did Barron, or 'the student,’ get bad grades?”

“Actually, we do not give out students ‘grades.’  Our students’ progress is indicated primarily with emojis.  We just want parents to sign it to keep them involved.”

“So what now?  Are you going to appeal this?”

“Appeal?  It’s a report card, it’s not like we are going to make a Federal case out of this.”

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